14 October 2010

How dare they?

Over the past few years I have encountered many stories very similar in theme to the current case playing out with the V family and the father of the child the V's literally took.

And what gets me is the audacity of PAP's and adopters who feel they have the right to another person's child and, when a member of that child's family decides to do what is their natural right and NORMAL, i.e. to raise their child, these selfish strangers decide to fight to take away this child from their heritage, identity and only family.

Please keep in mind, this post is ONLY about the cases of adopters fighting for children the parents want to raise and not about this that and the other in family law. Really. I don't want to hear it because it isn't pertinent to this subject.

When I first lost Amber because some people decided they would be better parents because they were married and had some money (well not heaps but more than me), I was told my story was unusual and so yes it was justified that I would be angry. Since then I have discovered this is just not true. Mothers from all over the world have emailed me with their stories; some in the process of trying to fight for their children, others who fought and lost and in none of these cases had the mothers done anything "wrong" (none of these mothers were alcoholics, promiscuous before the pregnancy, into drugs etc)... except, they fell prey and then easy victim to the adoption industry. And, instead of realising to truly love a child and want a child's best interests and welfare is to ensure the mother and child bond is retained and continued, selfish people have literally taken the children of these mothers away feeling they were more entitled.

Well I have a message for all of you who do this. You are despicable human beings. Truly and completely despicable and your actions prove to the world you do NOT and are NOT capable of loving the child you take from another woman's (or in some cases, man's) arms. If you really loved the child you say you do, you would do the right thing and put aside your desires and wants and give the child back to his/her family no matter what you think of them. To take a child against their parent's wishes regardless of what a court says is really no different to abduction because like abduction it is a crime against both the child and the parents. It doesn't matter if you look after the child, if you give them items they might not otherwise have. It doesn't matter if you have a beautiful house and this toy or that. Those things are merely that, just things. They do not give a person security in their identity. They do not show a person who their family tree is. They do not mean anything.

You could be cool, awesome or whatever to your friends and family but the action of taking a child against his/her mother OR father's wishes is a crime. A crime against the child. A crime against the parent. And a crime that will have lasting affects throughout the coming generations. You think just because a court says its okay that redeems you? Well, no. It doesn't. Every day the so called law courts do the wrong thing, and justice is seldom done. People get away with doing unimaginable crimes whilst others go to prison for doing nothing. In the eyes of Nature and those with a moral conscience, anyone who fights to take a child from their family is a criminal. A person with no moral fibre and has stooped to being a low life just to get what they want. That is what criminals do. They see what they want and they take it with no care or thought what their actions will do to others. And that is what any adopter/PAP's who fight in court against a mother and/or father for their family is. A low life criminal only thinking about their needs.

Stop lying to yourselves. You don't love that child. You can't.

And to those adopters out there who close open adoptions or lie to the child they adopt by not being honest, you are of the same filth. You are liars, dishonest thieves and I am sick of your existence littering the earth hurting people as you go. Shame. Shame on you. I pray Karma comes back and hits you when you least expect it. I am capable of compassion. I know I am. But when I see people CHOOSING to be blind to the pain they cause DELIBERATELY to ease their own guilty conscience, then my compassion is replaced by white, hot rage. You are not deserving of my compassion. Or anyone else's for that matter. The sad thing is you make adoptive parents who strive to care, love and understand their children look bad. Because all you care about is yourself. God have mercy on you because I sure as hell do not.

In the Bible I have read of the "unforgivable sin". Well in that same vein, as a person who is supposed to be created in God's likeness, I have one of those as well. And it is the theft of my child. My daughter, conceived by rape but still loved by me and the rest of her family, was not meant for adoption. I was bullied, coerced, lied to in order to pry her out of my arms and then when the Judge overturned my consent by saying the original agreement for her to live somewhere else no longer stood because I was standing there accepting my responsibility to raise her, two people decided they wouldn't accept that and fought for her, using corruption and deception. I didn't lose my child, she was stolen because of people like the V's. I pray this little boy will be reunited with his father quickly where he belongs and the V's learn their place in life. As strangers to him, like they were before he was born.

PAPS/Adopters: You do NOT have the right to another family's child. Whatever your reason is for adopting, it does NOT ENTITLE YOU TO ANOTHER MOTHER AND FATHER'S CHILD. Please, for the sake of the children you covet (and the rest of their family), get this in your head.

And because I know I am likely get some hate mail out of this because it isn't done to speak the truth, bite me. I don't care. I am sick of playing the adoption game. If you want to see adoption with blinkers on, fine, your choice. But for the rest of us enlightened ones, we will continue to speak the truth because we are sick of living in the dark created by the likes of you.


  1. I agree one million percent. These people are disgusting pigs. I hope the boy's real father sues them for every nickle they own, along with every attorney and "agency" involved.

    Karma WILL get these kidnappers one day, I just know it.

  2. Karma gets us, each and every one in the end. Sometimes it takes minutes sometimes decades, but it gets us in the end.
    Those transnational adoptees from Africa who are taken to America, pine and cry for the loss of their mother knowing that she is alive and they are not orphans, beg to go home and are not permitted to because they have been 'adopted',suffer so much and no-one appears to do anything about their suffering, other than ignore it.Is that moral, humane or caring?
    November is Adoption Awareness Month when we all get to speak our truth, no one can argue with that.

  3. Just echoing what Linda said. I hope this becomes the most costly "failed adoption" in history by the father's successful lawsuits.

  4. I agree with you completely Myst! Anyone who thinks they have the right to another's child and fights them for it, is despicable.

    I don't understand the thought process behind those who support such things. I don't understand how anyone can praise them for what they are doing.

    It is so wrong. Children deserve, first and foremost, to be with their biological families and nobody should ever, EVER, be allowed to fight against that simply because they have decided they deserve someone else's child and have deluded themselves into thinking they are better than the original parents.

    At some point, all of this just has to stop because I'm very very afraid of what our futures look like if it doesn't.

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  6. I absolutely agree with every word you wrote here, Myst. These people are low life scum to do this to a father and a family all because they think they are more deserving of someone else's child; when they are clearly NOT.

    One day, in the very near future, I can only hope that the public will start seeing so called "open" adoption and case such as the Vaughn's for what they are... FRAUD. Blatant and utter fraud. The people supporting these kidnappers are just as bad as they are, if you ask me.

    Karma sure is a you know what.

  7. Their actions are deplorable. Funny, they went whining to the media looking for sympathy and were shocked when faced with anger and contempt for their actions.

    That little boy is going to thank his father for loving him and fighting for him. He deserves his father and the father deserves his son.

    How do these individuals justify to themselves taking a father's child? Do they honestly believe that child will thank them for taking him from his family? For disregarding the law and court orders?

    Why haven't they been charged with kidnapping? At this point, I am surprised the authorities haven't taken their children and had them placed in care for their own safety. What a horrible situation they have purposely created. Their behaviour is cruel and beyond selfish.

    Their actions alone have caused enormous pain and anguish. And they still can only see themselves. Certainly not the child and his father. It's all about their sense of entitlement to a child that isn't theirs. Where do they get off believing they are owed this child? How can they possibly believe they are *better* for that child than his father? Are they already regretting all their hard-spent cash on a failed acquisition?

  8. Excellent post, Myst. When I think of the Vaughns, the term "bottom-feeding scum-suckers" comes to mind. That isn't love, keeping a child from his true family.

  9. Wow.....uniquely put, but oh so true, not fair is all I can say. I missed the chance to raise my daughter cause of somebody else.

  10. Myst,
    One wish and one wish only. That very soon, Amber reads this.

  11. Thanks everyone for all the supportive messages! I knew when I was posting I would be opening myself up for attack but so far so good :)

    And Debbie, yes, I would love Amber to know the truth one day... although I do not cherish the thought it will hurt her. However I place that blame squarely on her adopters shoulders. Had they left well enough alone, not lied to me, pressured me and then fought me for her, she would never have been separated and therefore never have the need to know of what happened to her. THEY caused all of it and I hope Karma pays them back dearly.

  12. hugs to you ((Myst))!! You are speaking truth to power. There is no reason (ethically) of why we were not given the right to raise our children. They abused the system, now they abuse our children. Shame on the whole system, and especially to these evil selfish inhumans.


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