Why "Living in the Shadows"?I am Myst - no, not my real name but an internet persona I have used in the adoption world for the past 18 years. I don't believe in the institution of adoption due to my own experience, research and being part of a wider adoption community where the damage and evil of adoption is well and truly evident. I started this blog to alert other unsuspecting expectant mothers to the realities of adoption behind the industry speak and as a way to get my voice and story out there as a record for the child that was stolen from me.
I had three children but thanks to adoption, I only have two now. Adoption destroyed more of me than I could ever imagine a person being destroyed. My blog is my personal space to write my thoughts, musings, rants and ramblings. I don't really care who likes it - I am not here to tiptoe around and pander to people's sensitivities - I just say it like it is. I don't believe in the concept of different "truths" - different perspectives perhaps, but there is only one truth. There are plenty of blogs out there than pander and prop up the false image of adoption as beautiful and wonderful - you will not find that crap here. I don't believe in "PAL" aka Positive Adoption Language - rather, I chose words that are realistic and honest.
I called this blog "Living in the Shadows" because it aptly describes the relationship between a mother and child in the farce of an "open" adoption. Both are merely in the shadow of the other - a whimsical part of the other's life, like a ghost - there, but not really there. Mother and child - yet not. Open Adoption is a lie and, quite frankly, a head job no one should have to endure - mother OR child - or even other family members like siblings who also suffer from this hideous practise.
Because the internet is full of people who like to dictate one's experience and abuse you for sharing your own experience, I have turned off comments - which is a real shame as I love thoughtful, measured and well reasoned comments but I frankly have no time for the abuse too many people are willing to dish out. All I can say, is if you don't like what I have to say, simple, don't read it. Everyone else, welcome!! :)